For a man so incredibly hairy and square, watching my dad get on a bike was like watching a penguin spread its wings and take flight. He'd take off at inhuman speed, a smile on his face, and never look back.

I drove from Naples to the Amalfi coast in an Alpha Romeo 1969 Spider, which was lovely. There have been lots of movies made down there, and I felt a bit like James Bond - the driving is quite hairy. The locals have mopeds, but you wouldn't catch me on a bike on those roads. A tank would be safer!

Something that I've always been really keen on representing is some honesty with the way that we view ourselves. That's something I've always appreciated watching actors that I've looked up to, is when they look like you and me, or they have a funny elbow, or they have, you know, a hairy face.

There is nothing in the world that I loathe more than group activity, that communal bath where the hairy and slippery mix in a multiplication of mediocrity.

Men's magazines often feature pictures of naked ladies. Women's magazines also often feature pictures of naked ladies. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art while the male body is hairy and lumpy and should not be seen by the light of day.