To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, "I wish I had known this some time ago.

I pity the young woman who will attempt to insinuate herself between my mama's boy and me. I sympathize with the monumental nature of her task. It will take a crowbar two bulldozers and half a dozen Molotov cocktails to pry my Oedipus and me loose from one another.