Religion, like water, may be free, but when they pipe it to you, you've got to help pay for piping. And the Piper!

When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas.

I'm not absolutely certain of my facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare -- or, if not, it's some equally brainy lad -- who says that it's always just when a chappie is feeling particularly top-hole, and more than usually braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with a bit of lead piping.

I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.

Religion like water may be free but when they pipe it to you you've got to help pay for piping. And the Piper!

When I wake up in the morning I just can't get started until I've had that first piping hot pot of coffee. Oh I've tried other enemas.