I've had so many cool moments on 'Monday Night Raw.'

Back when we was in school in Mississippi, we had Little Black Sambo. That's what you learned: Anytime something was not good, or anytime something was bad in some kinda way, it had to be called black. Like, you had Black Monday, Black Friday, black sheep... Of course, everything else, all the good stuff, is white. White Christmas and such.

I like to think I'm like the guy who goes to the office Christmas party Friday night, insults some people, but still has his job Monday morning.

From the pastor who has an affair with his secretary, to the jerk at the office who happens to be a deacon, to the overbearing boss who can't miss his Monday night Bible study, Christians today cause more problems for the gospel than all the devil's demons put together.

I can see how I could write a bold account of myself as a passionate man who rose from humble beginnings to cut a wide swath in the world, whose crimes along the way might be written off to extravagance and love and art, and could even almost believe some of it myself on certain days after the sun went down if I'd had a snort or two and was in Los Angeles and it was February and I was twenty-four, but I find a truer account in the Herald-Star, where it says: "Mr. Gary Keillor visited at the home of Al and Florence Crandall on Monday and after lunch returned to St. Paul, where he is currently employed in the radio show business? Lunch was fried chicken with gravy and creamed peas".

The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.

"She'd met Colin on a Monday.

When I was alive, I believed - as you do - that time was at least as real and solid as myself, and probably more so. I said 'one o'clock' as though I could see it, and 'Monday' as though I could find it on the map; and I let myself be hurried along from minute to minute, day to day, year to year, as though I were actually moving from one place to another. Like everyone else, I lived in a house bricked up with seconds and minutes, weekends and New Year's Days, and I never went outside until I died, because there was no other door. Now I know that I could have walked through the walls. (...) You can strike your own time, and start the count anywhere. When you understand that - then any time at all will be the right time for you.

You should never have to say hello or goodbye. Even at work sometimes and I know this is very unpopular is that if I'm going to work every single day I don't think you should have to hug people hello every single day when you come to work. I saw you Monday!

Monday Night Football started in 1970 and when it started it was something extremely special because sports had not been aired in prime time. So it was a novelty and a lot of people thought it wouldn't work and of course it worked spectacularly well.

The thing that stood out above and beyond all the experiences was this relationship with the nine-month-old baby. On weekends I'd be thinking about going back to set on Monday just to see the baby.

Our systems are all go. At 9:30 Monday morning trading will resume on both markets and the message will be given to criminals who foisted this on America that they lost.

I owed Lewis one thing at least. Once you had suffered the experience of presenting a case at one of his Monday morning conferences no other public appearance whether on radio TV or the lecture platform could hold any terrors for you.

I actually think the whole concept of retirement is a bit stupid so yes I do want to do something else. There is this strange thing that just because chronologically on a Friday night you have reached a certain age... with all that experience how can it be that on a Monday morning you are useless?

When I wake up on a Monday morning and I realise I don't have to go and work at the civil service I really think I've won.

I think my real depressions started when I was about 16 and doing The Patty Duke Show. I would go to bed at about 10 o'clock on a Friday night and not get up again until 6:30 Monday morning.

I obviously take a lot of pride in what I do on the football field because that has the ability to influence a lot of people. That puts smiles on people's faces. That gives people a pep in their step on Monday morning when they go back to work.

On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.

To be honest when I'm home every day is a Friday for me. It doesn't really matter what day it is for me. A lot of my friends actually have time off during the week and so it doesn't prohibit me from enjoying myself when I am home on a Monday or a Tuesday.

I was an OK boxer I wasn't great I was OK but I loved the discipline of getting together every Monday Wednesday and Friday usually Saturday afternoons too with a whole bunch of mates and training very very hard for about two-and-half hours.

I've been saying for a couple of years now that people need to let God out of the Sunday morning box that He doesn't want to just be with you for an hour or two on Sunday morning and then put back in His box to sit there until you have an emergency but He wants to invade your Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday and Sunday.

I do a one-hour workout called Drenched a cardio-boxing fitness routine Monday through Friday. There are usually between twenty-five and fifty people there - everyone from stay-at-home moms and professional martial artists to teenagers and seniors. They play great dance music. When I can I take two classes back-to-back.

There are pros and cons of experience. A con is that you can't look at the business with a fresh pair of eyes and as objectively as if you were a new CEO. Fire yourself on a Friday night and come in on Monday morning as if a search firm put you there as a turn-around leader. Can you be objective and make the bold change?

It's so amazing standing on the corner -this happened in Washington D.C. - and somebody comes by in a Cadillac and you hear 'Manic Monday' on the radio and you don't even know this person and they're listening to it and singing along with it. Wow! Blows your mind.