The trick is always to write in pairs because if at least two people find it funny you've immediately halved the odds of it not being funny.

I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes I had one thousand and sixty.

An Army is a collection of armed men obliged to obey one man. Every change in the rules which impairs the principle weakens the army.

We couldn't get the car back until well after the end of the race and we had very little time for repairs.