Look, it's easy to outsmart a werewolf or a vampire," Jace said. "They're no smarter than anyone else. But faeries live for hundreds of years and they're as cunning as snakes. They can't lie, but they love to engage in creative truth-telling. They'll find out whatever it is you want most in the world and give it to you-with a sting in the tail of the gift that will make you regret you ever wanted it in the first place.

Black Court vampires. I just shortened it some.

Michael had to pound me a couple of times to convince me not to go stage a rescue." Shane shrugged. "He hits like a girl, for a vampire.

I hate the vamp jobs. They think they're so suave. It's not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want to be all sexy, too. And trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy.

There is a crucifix, a few cloves of garlic, a wooden stake, a hammer, a blob of Silly Putty, and a pocketknife. "You do realize these people aren't vampires, right?" I say when Sam walks back in. "Yeah, but you never know. They're probably crazy, like you said." "And even if we were hunting vampires, what the hell is the Silly Putty for?" He shrugs. "Just want to be prepared.

First bubble baths. Now Disney parks. You're shattering every creep vampire myth I've ever heard.

Mulling this over, Vlad wiped her lip gloss from his lips with the back of his hand.Vampires, after all, didn't sparkle.

I am your sire. I am to guide you through your first days as a vampire. Your first feeding is a rite of passage, a sacrament. It will not be wasted on some hormone-driven frenzy. This is why I wanted you to feed from me.

You climbed into my window in the middle of the night. So, either you're some kind of Vampire or some kind of Perv. Which is it?

I like the sound of that, crashing Monica's party," he glanced at Michael, then quickly away. "What about you? That break some kind of vampire rules or something?

"I don't know what I was expecting a vampire's room to look like. Maybe lots of black, a bunch of books by Camus... oh, and a sensitive portrait of the only human the vamp ever loved, who had no doubt died of something beautiful and tragic, thus dooming the vamp to an eternity of moping and sighing dramatically.

I still can't believe," Michael said, sotto voce, "that you came to the Vampires' Masquerade Ball dressed as a vampire.

I'd made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters' hearts.

molesting the vampire while he's too weak to fight back, iz? jace asked. i'm pretty sure that violates at least one of the accords.

The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.

Before we go, I gotta know: If mind-reading abilities are real, there's something else I wondered if fiction got right about vampires-

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I'll have to risk it.

Terrific. A bisexual dominant vampire with kidnapping expertise.

So--what's it like, being a vampire?

If you want to write a fantasy story with Norse Gods, sentient robots, and telepathic dinosaurs, you can do just that. Want to throw in a vampire and a lesbian unicorn while you're at it? Go ahead. Nothing's off limits. But the endless possibility of the genre is a trap. It's easy to get distracted by the glittering props available to you and forget what you're supposed to be doing: telling a good story. Don't get me wrong, magic is cool. But a nervous mother singing to her child at night while something moves quietly through the dark outside her house? That's a story. Handled properly, it's more dramatic than any apocalypse or goblin army could ever be.

The strength of the vampire is that people will not believe in him.

What I'm working on now - I'm back to fantasy although considering that it's me I'm turning it into a kind of science fantasy. It's a vampire story - but my vampires are biological vampires. They didn't become vampires because someone bit them they were born that way.

But other vampire stories? Well no I really haven't read too many and I can't say I'm crazy about romantic vampires anyway - to me the vampire is simply an evil monster.

The vampire was a complete change from the usual romantic characters I was playing but it was a success.